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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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This blog is part 2 of the Church Family, in the series, “We Are Family” and I am going to continue speaking about the local church.
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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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In this blog, I am going to go into Pt. 2 of Raising Great Kids. Look in your bibles at Proverbs 22:6. In Raising Great Kids, I said that as parents, we needed first fear the Lord, walk in His ways and we would be blessed, our wife and our house would be fruitful and our children would be as “olive shoots” anointed and powerful.
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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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One of the foundational truths of marriage is Pursuit, check out Genesis 2:24 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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In this series of blogs titled, We Are Family, I am going to begin talking about the Church Family. We began this series, with marriage, then moved on to children and now we are at the Church and for now we will concentrate on the local church.
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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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Raising Great Kids, the dream of every parent. Check out Psalm 128:14. I want you to not what proceeds the blessing in this passage... it's the fear of the Lord. Fear is translated in this instance as reverent - meaning to honor, show respect and to bow; humility.
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We Are Family
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Written by Pastor Eddie
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In this blog, I want to talk about Possession and Priority. These two areas help to form the foundation for intimacy between a husband and a wife, and provide the establishment of trust and total surrender between spouses, so that your marriage can become a place of refuge and intimacy.
In marriage we need to allow God to begin to change our thoughts and perceptions of your spouse and change the way that you react to him/her. We need to allow Him (The Holy Spirit) to show you what your spouse rightfully needs and wants from you and then show you how to begin to respond accordingly.
Read Genesis 2:24 We have spoken about “leave” and “to hold fast to” and today we are going to look at “and they shall become one flesh.”
God designed a man and a women, in marriage, to be one; emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. If it affects your spouse in an area, it should also affect you. Here is what what needs to take place in order for that “oneness” to happen. First, surrender must take place. Those things that where yours individually before marriage, must now become co-owned and co-administrated. The only way that two things can become one, is for there to be a melding of both parts into one part. Anything we will not willingly surrender to our spouse to join together, will seriously hinder or even destroy our relationship.
Luke 14:33 gives us a picture of how the marriage relationship parallels our relationship with Jesus. Anything that we will not give up for Jesus is an idol and will prevent and intimate relationship between us and Him. The same holds true in marriage. For intimacy to occur, there must be total surrender.
Here are three violations that you often see in the area of possession. Money: “I won’t give you my money and possessions.” Children: especially in a blended family. Career: “It’s my career--I don’t need your input and you shouldn’t be telling me what to do.”
Here is why they are violations. Possessions communicate value, and if you will not surrender those areas, what you are communicating is that those areas are more important than your spouse. If you will not willingly give up ownership in a certain area of you life, you are telling your spouse, “You don’t have as much value as the issue at hand”.
This also creates legitimate jealousy, which is a fruit of wrong priorities. When your spouse feels less valued than possessions, buckle up cousin, the ride is about to get bumpy! However, when we are willing to join together, this will conquer jealousy. The reality is that, possessions can either enhance or inhibit intimacy.
1 Corinthians 7:3-4 Intimacy comes when two lives are totally share as one in marriage -- “All my thoughts, emotions, my body, time, children, money and future are yours.” You have complete and total access to every area of my life. The problems arise when we do not surrender those areas and we begin to use those possessions to manipulate and control. Then we begin to undermine and destroy intimacy in marriage by using sex as a means to control or punish our spouse.
A violation of intimacy occurs every time either of us withhold from the other in any are of our lives. It creates an independent spirit that is self-willed and destructive in marriage. A healthy response to possession creates interdependence. Here is the definition of Interdependence: it is a dynamic of being mutually and physically responsible to, and sharing a common set of principles with, others. Interdependence recognizes the truth in each position and weaves them together. It is the interconnectedness and the reliance on one another.
When we are interdependent with Possession, then it forces us to share and depend on one another, without it we separate and divide. Everything in your life affects your spouse and he/she has the need and the right to have a voice in any area of your life.
Purity, which is also God’s design for marriage, should take place both physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Genesis 2:25 the Hebrew word for naked is the word “arom” which means exposed. Well in order have an atmosphere of nakedness there must be an atmosphere of Purity. There is no other relationship that we have that requires or allows total nakedness, then that which is necessary in marriage.
That was they way God created it to be. The man and the women both naked and unashamed. Then sin entered into the Garden of Eden and along with it came shame and Adam and Eve covered themselves with leaves. Sin causes Purity to leave the marriage relationship and hiding takes its place, and hiding always leads to darkness.
What did they hide? They hid what was different!
All other aspects of the human body are similar in men and women, except for their genitals, which happen to be the most sensitive part of our bodies. Here is what that says, “When you have purity in your marriage, you can trust each other with your differences and you can expose the most sensitive areas of your life.” On the other hand, “When you sin against each other, trust leaves and you begin to hide and try and protect the sensitive areas of your life.
Here is how that is walked out. First, we must begin to be careful of what we say and what we do. Sin creates wounds and will cause our spouse to not be able to trust us. Everything that we say will have an effect on our spouse’s ability to be open and transparent and exposed to us.
If there is insecurity, emotions will be hidden; if there is purity everything will be out in the open and exposed. You can get naked man! Did I just type that out loud? We have to be willing to take responsibility for our actions. If we have sinned against our spouse, take responsibility, we have violated our spouse. Don’t cover it up, bring it to the light, repent and forgive.
Then for those that have been violated against, don’t become a prosecuting attorney, when your spouse confesses and repents - you forgive! We need to learn that words can wound and they can also heal. “I’m sorry, I was wrong. Will you forgive me?” “I’m sorry” can be the two most healing words, if we would say them with a repentant heart.
Possession and Purity - two of God’s foundational laws for marriage that form the foundation for intimacy between a husband and a wife. God designed marriage to be one; emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. We must surrender our lives to each other and operate in our lives in purity. We you allow God to begin to change the thoughts and perceptions you have about your spouse and change the way that you react to him/her. Will you allow Him to show you what your spouse rightfully needs and wants from you and then show you how to begin to respond accordingly.
Let’s put down independence and become interdependent with our spouses. As we walk through repentance and forgiveness, let’s be willing to expose ourselves in purity, sharing the most sensitive areas of our lives with the trust that we are in a safe environment were we can walk totally unashamed. We need to begin to speak words that heal and remove the words that cause wounds.
God’s laws of Priority, Pursuit, Possession and Purity are laws that we begin a marriage on, live our marriage on and can heal our marriage on. If you are hear today and you are in violation of these foundational laws, I want you to know, you can change that today.
Look to God, repent; look to your spouse, repent. If you have been violated in these areas, when your spouse repents, forgive. Then get your priorities in order, begin to pursue and do what you did at the beginning, begin to surrender and become interdependent; speak words of purity that lead to life and openness. Walk with God in your marriage; He wants to see you prosper...We Are Family. |
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